Sunday, November 9, 2008

RichWriters Inspiration: Writers' Choices

Choices in life. There are so many times when I am talking to people and I just cringe at the thought that they say they have no choice, but I had to, they said and the truth is you never have to do anything. You choose to do anything. Oh, sure there are consequences both good and bad for doing certain things and make interesting choices but you never have to.


                        You do not have to go to work. Oh sure, you want to go to work because you wanted to be able to provide for yourself and your family but you do not have to go to work. You do not have to stay with this man because of the children. You choose to stay with the man because it is more convenient than going out there and providing for yourself despite the way he treats you, you choose to and I want you to understand that today that life is about nothing but choices. You choose to do something or you choose not to. You want to do something or you want not to.


When I was younger in middle school, our PE teacher Mr. Wallen, use to tell us that everything is 90% mental and 10% physical. You either choose to do something or you choose not to, you do not want to do something or you want not to. There is no such thing as "can't", "cannot". You either want to do something or you do not want to do something. You either want to run that one mile run or you do not want to because it feels too hard for you. It is a choice and so when you think about your relationships right now and you think about, "Oh, I have to stay with her because we have kids and we've been together for 45 years," and "Oh my God, if I ever left her, then what will she do?" etc., etc., etc.


But let me tell you something. If you are miserable and she is not making you feel any better and you have gone to marriage counseling and you really done everything you can, you have chosen to stay with her or you choose not to. Now, I am not saying abandoning your family or anything like that as a good choice. You have to look at what is going to make you happy because let me tell you something, at the end of the day, the whole reason why you are doing anything is because you want to feel a certain way.


You say you want to pay your bills but the reason why you pay your bills and not to pay your bills until that you feel that relief. Some people have created such a stressing life because the feeling of relief afterward feels so good. Do you ever notice that whenever you have a massage that pressure someone puts on you after, do you feel good? It is the release that feels good, the pressure that is released that feels good.


So some people have in their head that if they struggle long enough that somehow God, the angels, the universe are going to come in and rescue them on a white horse and that feeling they have created such struggle because they have created in the past that if they struggle really, really hard and they get to the very bottom, the very bottom, there is something good that happens. But you know why that happens?


Two reasons, number one, because they created scenarios like that and number two, because at that point you finally let go and got out of the way and that the universe like God come in and do what He needs to do, what she needs to do. You have finally accomplished what you need to accomplish which is to get out of the way. You have finally stopped being in the way and allowed things to happen because sometimes you create problem in your life, so much stress in your life that you got no other choice to turn but to let go and say or drop your hands and go, "I don't know what to do." And then, God sets in.


But how have you done that in the beginning? How do you say, "You know what? I'm not sure how to do this but I know things are going to work out because they always do," then they will. Do you ever really notice in your life the things that you really are stressed out about let us say ten years ago, someone that really yelled at you or whatever the case? Now, you do not even remember that situation. You do not even care.


I have kept the journals since I was in eighth grade and I realized that people that I was really in love with, I do not even know who they are anymore. I read the journal and I am like, "who's that?" and so it goes to show that even things that were important to you long time ago do not really matter anymore. So, when you get really stressed out of that person who really ticked you off today, who cut you off on the road or whatever, think about it, next week you probably are not going to remember it and let alone ten years from now.


So think about that. Put the things in the perspective that really you have a choice to either dwell on those things or not dwell on those things. I do not want to hear anymore a war. I just had somebody tell me today, "Oh, I have to work today. Oh, I have no other choice." No, you do have a choice. Yes, you may choose not to struggle because working extra hours makes it easier for you but you choose to and that very thought should make you feel powerful because if you created the good in your life and you created the bad in life, you just created more of either one. You chose to do what you think you should do. It was your choice. You created that situation. You created every little bit of it. It was your choice, remember that. You always have a choice. You always have a choice.